Monday, August 11, 2008
Goodbye
.
Today was the last day of the wake.
I expected myself to cry during the cremation. However, i didn't. While everyone else were crying hard i stood in the middle, quiet, watching on. I looked at faces, and the process. No i will never forget this moment in a lifetime.
I heard silence and peace among all the crying.
I don't really know why.
After everything i walked over to mum and dad.
I had a straight face.
But i fell into a simple, inexorable oblivion of tears
.
Thanks everyone for being there. Especially love, you've been there in every way every single day since granddad went into the hospital. You were there to hold my hand, wipe my tears and embrace me. You were there to make me smile and laugh and have little moments of happiness which took me away for brief moments from the undeniable facts.
I wish you could be next to me forever.
I want to wake up to your face again tmr.
.
Thanks everyone for your comments too. Please dont quarrel on the tagboard i find it quite weird and funny
.
Last night i took photo albums which were around since 1933 to have a look at. They had pictures of my grandad when he was young and they had photos of my dad when he was a baby. They were in black and white. The pictures are extremely beautiful.
I was left wondering how the hell a camera from that age could focus such beauty, create shadows on faces and capture life in motion.
Looking at all the photos was a ride of discovery.
It really was i have decided to keep my own. Apparently Granddad was a serious photographer who had a friend was was famous in that scene in his time. I guess thats why he could come out with photos like that
At least i can see his past and now i can remember him by with these photos.
.
Tomorrow i'm studying in school.
.
I have not slept for 3 days
.
I still can't believe you're gone.
